Navigating Triggers
We’ve all had those moments—something seemingly small happens, and suddenly we’re overwhelmed by a flood of emotions. Our hearts race, we feel anxious or angry, and our first instinct is to pull away, react, or shut down. These moments are known as triggers, and while they can feel disorienting or frustrating, they hold deep wisdom.
From a trauma-informed perspective, triggers are not just random reactions. They are signals from our body and nervous system, rooted in past experiences, that communicate something important: an unmet need, a misalignment with our values, or a deeper wound that requires attention. Understanding and navigating our triggers can become a powerful path to healing and self-empowerment.
What Are Triggers?
A trigger is anything—an event, a person’s words, a situation—that sparks a strong emotional or physical response in us. These responses often feel disproportionate to what’s happening in the present moment because they are connected to past trauma or unresolved emotions. When triggered, we may react as if we are reliving a past experience, even though the current situation is different.
This happens because our body is functioning from old programming, still trying to protect us from a danger that is no longer present. Our nervous system gets activated as if we’re in the same threat we once faced, and our reaction becomes a survival response.
Triggers as Teachers
While triggers can be painful, they are also incredible teachers. They point us to places within ourselves that need care and healing. If we can pause in the moment of a trigger and ask, “What unmet need is being communicated right now?” we shift from reacting to learning.
For example, if you’re triggered by a friend canceling plans at the last minute, the initial reaction might be anger or sadness. But if you dig deeper, you may find that this situation is highlighting an unmet need for connection or respect. Or perhaps it’s activating a belief from childhood that you’re not important enough to be prioritized.
The trigger is not there to harm you—it’s there to help you identify where you are still functioning from old stories or unhealed wounds. It’s a reminder to meet the need for yourself, rather than waiting for someone else to do it for you.
Meeting Your Own Needs
One of the most powerful ways to navigate triggers is to recognize that the unmet need they are highlighting is one you can meet yourself. If a trigger is rooted in feeling unworthy or unseen, the path forward is to learn how to offer yourself validation and care.
Here’s how you can begin to embody and meet your own needs:
1. Pause and Breathe:
When a trigger arises, it’s easy to get swept up in the emotion. Take a moment to breathe and ground yourself. This simple pause allows you to step back and observe what’s happening rather than reacting automatically.
2. Identify the Need:
Ask yourself, *“What need is not being met right now?”* Are you seeking safety, love, acceptance, or control? Identifying the need helps you understand what your body is asking for.
3. Meet the Need:
Once you’ve identified the need, reflect on how you can meet it for yourself. If you need validation, practice giving yourself the reassurance that you are enough. If it’s safety, explore ways to create a sense of security within your environment or body, such as grounding exercises or somatic work.
4. Offer Compassion and Nurturing:
Triggers can feel overwhelming, but remember that they are part of your healing process. Offer yourself compassion in these moments. It’s okay to feel what you’re feeling, and it’s okay to not have all the answers right away.
Triggers and Values: A Path to Empowerment
Not all triggers stem from past trauma—sometimes, they arise because something in our present is misaligned with our values. For instance, if you value honesty and integrity, being in a situation where someone is deceptive or manipulative might trigger a strong emotional reaction.
In these cases, your trigger is showing you where your boundaries or values are being crossed, it’s highlighting what’s important to you. This kind of trigger is an invitation to stand in your truth and align with what matters most to you. It’s an empowering moment where you can choose to act in a way that honors your values rather than being reactive.
By recognizing that some triggers are pointing to values that are important to us, we can approach these moments with clarity and strength. Instead of being overwhelmed by the trigger, we can use it as a signal to set boundaries, make empowered choices, and move in alignment with our deeper self.
Navigating Triggers with Compassion
Navigating your triggers takes time, patience, and compassion. There’s no rush to "fix" yourself or avoid being triggered. In fact, it’s the opposite—lean into the trigger as an opportunity for growth and self-discovery.
By understanding the unmet needs behind your triggers, you can begin to meet those needs in a way that honors yourself. By recognizing when your values are being crossed, you can step into your power with greater confidence.
Triggers, while challenging, are ultimately invitations to reconnect with yourself, to heal the past, and to live more fully in alignment with who you truly are. When you can approach them with curiosity and care, they become stepping stones to a more empowered, self-compassionate life.
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If navigating your triggers feels overwhelming, I invite you to explore this process with support. Whether through individual therapy, group work, or somatic practices, there are tools and resources that can help you move from feeling reactive to feeling empowered. Reach out, and together we can uncover the lessons and healing opportunities that lie within your triggers.
Author:
Bella Barajas, LMHC
Licensed Mental Health Counselor
IFS Therapist - Level 1 Trained
EMDR Therapist
